You know the night: Mercury is in retrograde, your boyfriend dumped you, Brad and Angelina filed for divorce — proving love is a lie — and someone commented on your Instagram but didn’t like it. You are armed with a pint of “Half Baked” and cradled in the comfort of your favorite fuzzy blanket.

Tonight you have but one goal. Tonight…you are going to cry.

“Stuck in Love”: 4/5

“Stuck in Love” is your traditional rom-com, but with not one, not two, but three emotionally devastating love stories to break your heart. “Stuck in Love” features all the romantic leads you’ve come to know and love, like Lily Collins, Nat Wolff, Logan Lerman and yes, that is the dad from “The Last Song,” actor Greg Kinnear. This movie will break down all your walls.

Why it will make you cry: One of the three love stories ends up unresolved, which just doesn’t seem fair. Additionally, you’ll want to date Logan Lerman and that somehow just doesn’t appear to be in the cards.

“The Last Five Years”: 4.5/5

The year of “Hamilton” is upon us, and no tears will fall without the help of a catchy musical number. “The Last Five Years,” starring that girl from the a capella movies (Anna Kendrick), and a Broadway star you probably wouldn’t recognize by name (Jeremy Jordan), traces a relatably dysfunctional relationship from its naïve beginning to its all-too-predictable dissolution.

Why it will make you cry: Because you will suddenly realize why your boyfriend dumped you. Plus, you will never be as good of a singer as Anna Kendrick, and you know you wanted to go on “The Voice” one day.

“Last Holiday”: 5/5

Alright. You’ve cried, you’ve wallowed, you’ve mourned. Now it’s time for happy tears. “Last Holiday” stars Queen Latifah as the once-mousy Georgia Byrd, who, when diagnosed with a terminal illness, proceeds to do what any reasonable woman would do: eat a lot of food and buy a lot of clothes. As a fun bonus, Georgia lives right here in New Orleans, which is a nice reminder that you may be able to find joy in this city after all.

Why it will make you cry: Queen Latifah is a true queen and too pure for this world. Also, for a professional rapper playing an outside grill salesperson, LL Cool J is weirdly lovable in this movie.