Freshman girl queue
November 17, 2015
In modern culture, the word “basic” has gotten a bit of a bad rap. For some reason, liking things that a large majority of people like has become a taboo. But realistically, if something is popular, there’s probably a reason. Pumpkin spice lattes? Delicious. Taylor Swift? Incredibly fun to jam out to at literally any given time. And the classic “freshman girl” TV shows? Life-changing.
Gossip Girl: 4 Stars
“Gossip Girl” is the best friend your mom never wanted you to play with when you were growing up. Super fun, sassy, rebellious and knowledgeable about sex, drugs and alcohol.
Which, of course, is why your mom never wanted you to play together.
While “Gossip Girl” and its neverending downward spiral of teenage debauchery may in fact be the root cause of this generation’s utter lack of morals, nobody can deny that the love-to-hate characters, constant dramatics and tantalizing opulence of the show makes it borderline addictive to watch.
Admittedly, the dialogue of the show has a strong tendency to be melodramatic to a point bordering on unintentional satire, and the portrayal of Brooklyn essentially as a third-world country may seem a bit questionable, but what “Gossip Girl” lacks in quality, it makes up for in really, really hot actors.
One Tree Hill: 4.5 Stars
Oh, young Chad Michael Murray. Never will there again be such a champion of teen pop culture – and never with such a magnificent dusting of chin stubble.
Yet, even as Chad (after nine seasons of devotion, we’re on a first name basis) is slowly faded out of the show, “One Tree Hill” stands true: an unfailing beacon of true 2000s drama.
In its early seasons, “One Tree Hill” follows the constant flux of the lives of high schoolers in Tree Hill, North Carolina. Basketball technically plays a major role in the plot, yet even a true fan will be able to make it through all nine seasons without having any idea what a point guard does. (Defense?)
After the vaguely inexplicable four-year jump in time, however, the show focuses in on a true queen: the sassy, successful and inspirational Brooke Davis. While she might have been the traditional “queen bee you love to hate” in high school, Brooke grows into a role model for any and everyone who watches “One Tree Hill.” We’re so proud of you, Brooke.
Plus, Brooke, and seemingly everyone she interacts with, is really, really hot.
Grey’s Anatomy: 5 Stars
“Grey’s Anatomy” is a life ruiner. It ruins people’s lives. In a good way, but still.
A vehicle for emotional destruction under the premise of a medical show, “Grey’s Anatomy” follows the day-to-day lives of several surgeons at Seattle Grace Hospital.
While these day-to-day activities mostly consist of illicit sex in the on-call rooms and drama reminiscent of a middle school lunch table, the smattering of genuine medical emergencies gives “Grey’s Anatomy” an intensity that inspires true loyalty in its fanbase.
The emotional commitment a fan must make to “Grey’s Anatomy” is akin to that one might make in a semi-toxic relationship. A constant, unwavering devotion that trumps all academic, social, or familial commitments, coupled with an inevitable emotional destruction – but also an inability to part ways despite any self destructive tendencies it might bring out in you.
But it’s all okay, because every doctor is portrayed by a really, really hot actor.
Leave a Comment