Arcade’s guide on how to dance at The Boot zb
October 13, 2015
Forever scented with cigarettes and Abercrombie cologne, The Boot can intimidate in its class and sophistication. This establishment demands the finest of dance moves to those who decide to rage within its walls. To the students who are completely inexperienced and want to dance with friends, or are looking for that extra step to boost their game in the nature documentary-like mating ritual dancing at The Boot can resemble, The Arcade has provided a handy guide. Here are some tips for the struggling on how to dance properly at The Boot.
1. When inside The Boot, scope the scene and make deliberate eye contact with anyone who walks by. By asserting such dominance, you automatically give yourself the confidence needed to own The Boot and sway back and forth like a pro. Confidence and uniqueness truly shine when you wear trendy clothing labels, so try picking the very uncommon brand, Vineyard Vines.
2. The Boot music can vary and fluctuate, as DJs switch often. Some nights you might be reminisced with some early-2000s R&B such as Usher and R. Kelly. Other nights, your ears might experience the soothing sounds of hardcore rap, such as Ying Yang twins and A$AP Mob. The occasional Drake medley between mainstream Taylor Swift will have any girl singing along. Other nights, your body might be shaking and your ears might be vibrating to the bumping techno sounds of house or Skrillex. The trick to dancing at The Boot is being able to adapt to these different styles of music and sounds. Ultimately, make sure your dance steps reflect the tone and pulse of the music or face the wrath of Boot bartenders laughing at you.
3. For those less experienced Boot dancers, no need to try moves from Silento’s music video. To create a dance mob, form a circle in which it orbits around a central dancer. If you succeed in becoming the dancer in the middle, be sure to incorporate all forms of embarrassing dance techniques from the ’90s to today. By showing the diversity of your dance repertoire, from Cotton Eyed Joe to the Nae Nae, you will become the envy of all those that surround you. Ignore the flashing lights of phone cameras and laughter. They’re probably recording your success and talent to study for their own dance improvement.
4. For some, dancing in general might not be a favorite activity nor is it a common one. So, while dancing at The Boot, it’s best to casually and consistently pump your fist in the air to prove you’re in touch with cultural and societal norms. By pumping your fist like a fraternity recruit, you will succeed in receiving the respect of the brothers and the attention of all you desire. Be sure to bring up “Jersey Shore” if questioned. The cultural relevance to that show will always persist, no matter how long it’s been off the air.
5. Do not get into a dance battle with the acapella singer next to you. They will school you in stage presence. Don’t go too crazy when dancing either. The last thing you want to do is knock into a feisty 5-foot 4-inch girl or a belligerent 6-foot 9-foot basketball player. In both of those cases, you will be exiting The Boot with a bruised black eye and that will not accessorize your “confident” look.
6. Last, and absolutely not least, no matter how much you want to show off that one breakdancing move you learned at a bar mitzvah party, or how low Lil Jon tells you to get, do not, under any circumstances, touch The Boot floor. That’s just gross.
Leave a Comment