Dear Zeus,

As a freshman at Tulane, I’ve had to adjust to many new aspects of college life over the past month, from finances and laundry, to academic and social pressures. Each week I have to decide when I should study, eat, clean, socialize, exercise, shop, call home and so on. One challenge I was not prepared for, however, was dealing with your seemingly random, maniacal spouts of rain.

It’s not just the rain that bothers me. The heat and humidity are equally unbearable. I’m from Texas, so I’m used to the heat. What I’m not used to is the intense, almost painfully-hot subtropical sunlight, or the sticky humidity of the air. In the morning, my dorm room window is covered in condensation. Walking outside is like walking into a sauna. In one of my more absentminded moments, I started to strip before realizing I was not actually in the steam room. Fortunately, I was able to cover my mistake by using my shirt to wipe off the condensation on the screen of my phone.

Nevertheless, the most unpredictable aspect of the New Orleans climate is rain.

There is a chance of rain literally every day. If it’s sunny and hot, it will probably rain. If it’s cloudy and humid, it probably just stopped raining and will rain again soon. If it’s none of the above, you’re probably still in New England.

Let me give you an example of my everyday life at Tulane.

I wake up at 8:30 a.m. and stumble to my 9 a.m. class. It’s humid and partially cloudy. Afterward I go to Bruff, and on the way to my second class the sky breaks and I am soaked in the five minutes it takes to walk there. Inside, the air conditioning is cranked down to 63 degrees, so I shiver in the back of the auditorium while I wait for class to end.

Outside, it is hot, humid and cloudy. I go back to my dorm, slushing across the swampy quad in my tennis shoes. Now comes the moment of truth. Should I put on my rain jacket in the 85 degree weather or risk full exposure to another downpour? Finally, after 20 minutes of deliberation, I tie the rain jacket around my waist. 

Is this what my life has come to, Zeus? Wearing a rain jacket around my waist? Must I endure this kind of fashion humiliation just because you don’t know how to maintain a stable climate? How many pairs of shoes will I have to go through? 

Sincerely,

Rain, Rain, Go Away