Post-Mardi Gras recovery in 3 easy steps

Harrison Simon, Staff Reporter

Mardi Gras has officially concluded, and with that, students are jumping right back into the daunting balance between going out and going to class. This transition can be difficult for many, so The Hullabaloo has laid out the top three pro tips to help everyone get back up to full speed in no time!

  1. Re-Fueling

You’re probably wiped out after Tequila Sunrise (We know we are), and it may take a few days for you to stop feeling so tired all the time. So, make sure you have LOTS OF SUGAR to stay awake. It doesn’t matter what people say about how it isn’t good for you, what do doctors know anyway? All we know is enough sugar will have you bouncing off the walls to write a ten-page paper the night before it’s due. Also, while you’re at it, drink exclusively coffee; caffeine and caffeine only is how the strong survive.

  1. Those Damn Papers

Speaking of papers, you must be thinking to yourself, how in the world am I going to finish that 3,000 word essay on Greek mythology by Friday? Well, the answer is simple: sleep non-stop until 3:00 a.m. the night before your essay is due so you have maximum energy reserved! Let’s be real here, you’re bound to procrastinate anyway, so you might as well rest up beforehand, ‘cause you’ve got a long night ahead of you.

  1. Working Out

Even if you do stick to a regular gym routine, chances are you haven’t been to Reily in a few days. But sometimes it feels like you’ve got so much going on at once that you can never fit in a full workout. Well, we’ve got just the solution for you. To cut down on your workout time, run instead of walking to Boot Pizza! That 5-10 minute run will get you nice and energized, and you’ll certainly have a worked up appetite. Give yourself a pat on the back and enjoy a delicious, cheesy, definitely-not-overpriced slice of pizza. To maximize results, do this AT LEAST once a day. You won’t be sorry you did!

So, there you have it. Your definitive post-Mardi Gras recovery plan. To quote the Jackson 5, “It’s as easy as 1-2-3!”

Note: The Hullabaloo and its associates are not liable if these Mardi Gras steps do not aid in your post-Mardi Gras recovery.

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